Sex in 2014

SEX in 2014

Sex is everywhere in the 50’s it was like this dirty little secret that nobody talk about and we only did it to recreate life in the 60’s it was everywhere women got there say the pill was given and women had sex for enjoyment.. Women for the 1st time ever got to expernice an mind blowing organism to a random stranger that they didn’t need to be married to

Fast forward to 2013 and I think people are running out of ways to pleasure them self’s!!! There are some insane ways to pleasure your self so many toys, durex invited underwear for women and men that they can control from and iPhone you can watch from your phone while your partner gets pleasured what ever happened to human touch, it’s a dieing culture… To feel the warm flesh if another human beside you will soon be a thing of the past and all we will have are our smart phones.

We have sex in adverts we use it to sell cars, jäger bombs and clothes. We have strip clubs, brothels, swingers, street Conners it’s EVERYWHERE!!

I once read this piece in paper that a women claimed to fall pregnant while watching a 3D porn with her girl friends (I laughed so hard at this) imagine if Mary and Joseph where alive today! What would Joseph say to Mary when she said she got pregnant from the cloud in the sky!!

I see people from all walks of life and I try but sometimes I can’t help but judge.. But then I think who the hell am I to judge these people. I know a lady who every body judges, I met her in the bar I worked in not far from her work with it’s expensive name (tiffanies) with red lights on the outside of the front door every cab in the city knows the address.. Men are born knowing where to find it.

Let’s say her name is Rose and god love rose she works hard (punt intended) she a brothel worker, lady of the night, that women whatever you want to call her.. She is married with a daughter.. When I first crossed paths with Rose I was confused with her Line of work I couldn’t understand as her husband makes good money and really she doesn’t need to work.. I was intrigued by her as to way she does this job??

Rose does it for the money yes but because she enjoys it , she enjoys the wigs the dress up and been with someone different every day, she doesn’t do drugs she said she really loves her job because she is addicted to sex. Every working girl has a special job that only she can perform, she has her regulars who come to visit each night she is working if she has a night off she sends the message out to her fans… Do you think they feel they are in a relationship with her ?? (weird)!
one point she made very clear was that she only cums for her hubby!

Now that left me with a lot of questions?? Say your in a 12 hr shift pretty busy night you’ve had at least 8 guys in with you so your working hard and you go home hop into bed with your husband and he wants sex.. Do you give it to him??

I try not to judge I don’t even like it when I think I am doing it because we are all far from perfect.. But I guess what am trying to say is now in 2013 you have a relationship with Siri on your phone have sex with a married women, have group sex and even sex with someone’s wife while the husband watch!!

Even the dating game has changed now people are meeting through tinder the dating app but that’s a whole other story for a whole other day.

The game is changing


When to realise enough is enough

I often people watch and one thing I have learnt is people don’t stop until they lose everything!

Double vodka cranberry juice at 7am she orders them everyday she has about 6/7 before heading to the bottle shop to buy a half bottle.. Every morning for months I ask the same question how are you? Same response well thank you. Same question different morning but this time I got a different response I got a story of the life behind the double vodkas at 7am!

I’ve lost it all was the response, I’ve lost my husband he has filed for divorce and wants our daughter full time our million dollar house is on the market! Of course I was shocked and ask how this all came about? She said it started with a single vodka before work, then at lunch time then a few after work which went for months which lead her to drinking a bottle a day maybe more, blanking out not remembering how to get home not waken up to take her daughter to school which lead to guilt which lead to a bottle of vodka.. Drink to forget!!

After our very deep discussing over the bar I ask her if she knew the reason why she has lost everything? She couldn’t answer just looked blankly and drank her vodka!

5 Life Lessons as Explained by My Cat

Gone Catawampus

Be Awesome in Your Own Fur

1. Take Pride in Your Appearance

We are divine, noble, and gorgeous creatures by nature. Therefore, appearance is everything. Every chance you have, be sure to lick yourself to keep your fur in place and looking glossy. Bask in your glory on a windowsill and allow other people to admire your exquisiteness. Nap.

*Disclaimer: Cats have impossible standards of beauty. Do not attempt to live up to such. Focus on your natural beauty. Gone Catawampus does not recommend licking one’s self as a practice of cleanliness. Please use normal human methods. Thank you.

2. Know Your Comfort Zone

I don’t mean that you should hide under the bed all day. (Though it is useful when the evil vacuum is out.) Discover where that smell is coming from. Go see if you can climb that new bookshelf.  Figure out what is…

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Why is mammey always the bad guy?


Why is mammey always the bad guy?.

Why is mammey always the bad guy?

The annual event every Easter as many of Sydney folk know is the Easter show. It brings joy and tears to the little faces of bright eyed kids.

10am everyone is packed into the car, jackets incase it rains, baby wipes for the little faces covered in blue fairy floss.

M5… Daddy starts to hmm along to a bouncy beat he bleats out some tunes with a voice that world cut ( of course I tell him it’s the voice of and angle), meanwhile my bossy Little sweetheart with a face that butter wouldn’t melt screams DADDDY stop signing!!
Daddy softy but firmly reminds the little princess in the back that it’s his car.

Both look at me, I can feel my husbands eyes burning on the side of my face, I can feel Aoife’s big brown eyes burning the back of my head.

Then it goes something like this..

Husbands: Babe tell her it’s my car
Me: Why??
Aoife: Mammey!!
Husband: you have her spoiled! This all started when she was 15 months old! They have you wrapped around there little fingers.
Me: Jesus Christ give me a break.

Lots of noise sounds of screaming crying.

Me: Right that’s it both of you shut up!
At least silence, we arrive at home bush I am feeling annoyed a little pissed off and worked up. Aoife bounces out of the car with Jason both of them say sorry to each other and promise each other a great time at the Easter show.

I think to myself why do I always end up the bad guy ?

Living with a 4 year old and a 3 year old

When my kids moved from baby beds to big kids beds my sister advised me to buy the best single bed as you our your husband will be sleeping in a single bed for the next 6 years.
I took her advise and glad I did.

Here’s an example of how my husband bed hops.. Bedtime starts around 7.30pm after dinner bath time I announce it’s time for bed lets go, Aoife gets in the top bunk Caden in the bottom stories are read lights out night night, just as I close the door it starts! Lay next to side me … I need a drink of water… One more hug… One more kiss… Did you know batman is a good guy blah blah blah. I Finlay hit my bed exhausted from working all day listen to drunken customers with 1st world problems.

I wake up at 1am I have a 4 year old on one side my husband on the other, 2am 4 year old laying across my face husband hanging of the bed, 4am 4 year old has taken over the queen size bed husband is missing mummey is hanging on for dear life and 3 year old has taking over the bottom of the bed!

6am I have two kids jumping on my stomach shouting it’s morning… Ahh let the breakfast battle begin :/

Toddlers = 1
Daddy = 0

Spelling your husbands name correctly

I’ve been married for 5 years now I have two children so I blame my scatter brain on that. After 5 years of marriage I still spell my husbands name wrong! It’s not a hard name it’s Killorn I know the spelling off by heart. I had to set up a new email account so I decided to keep it simple something I would remember nothing like ha… So I decided to go with my name and surname… I still messed it up I spelled it Killron!!! I though nah Il rock it no one will notice expect everybody including my husband who tells me it’s embarrassing! Surely I am not alone